Strolling the streets of Salt Lake City, you're bound to run
across a few Utah residents with an important message for
visitors and locals: Lock up your daughters. Athletes are
here, winter athletes, and we all know what that means.
It means sex. Just ask Brandi Swindell, an anti-sex
campaigner with a group called the Utah Eagle Forum, whose
members have taken to the streets in futile combat against
the nefarious forces of fornication.
Ms. Swindell expressed her worries succinctly the other day
in a series of frenzied questions:
"Where are the Olympic athletes getting their sex partners?
Are they bringing their own?... Or are they going out on the
streets of Salt Lake City looking for our sons and daughters?"
What has set off the ire of Ms. Swindell and her friends is
the Olympic organizing commitee's effort to hand out tens of
thousands of condoms to Olympic visitors, so that just in
case they manage to squirrel out of their eight layers of
clothing for some icy ruttings in the snow, they don't
contribute to the state's already high rate of sexually
Ms. Swindell, whose catchy slogan is "just say no to
condoms," would rather the visitors keep their hands, and
other organs, to themselves. She wants to "send a positive
message of morality and wholesomeness" to the Olympians. That
message, in non-Utah parlance, is simple: Keep it in your